The Seattle Freeze and Bellingham Curse

Do I suck as a person?  Am I not educated enough for the people up here?  Does the weather up here make everyone irritable?  What gives?  I have lived in Colorado, Montana, NC, Florida, California, and Arizona.  However, this state disappoints me.  I have been up here now several months and have lurked through these trip reports and partner wanted section of this site, and I have encountered and interacted with over 100 people and tried to befriend, maybe some from this site, while out skiing, cycling, cliff jumping, and running, and its seems people really don't give a rat's ass about going green the real way.

You call banning plastic bags in Seattle and Bellingham going green?  Charging 5 cents for a paper bag going green?  This is a bunch of bull pucky in my opinion.  I have read many articles about this Seattle Freeze and the Bellingham Curse.  I know I may be offending many of you, but I find many people up here are conceited, cliquish, and do not care to add anyone new to their tight knit circle of friends. 

Going green means accepting others for who they are, carpooling and saving money and adding less traffic to the roadways.  Going green does not mean charging 5 cents for a paper bag on an already fragile economy.  As for plastic bags;  what's wrong with using them and then recycling them? 

I find it know wonder why Seattle has a high suicide rate:  it's not the weather, but it's the people who seem to keep to themselves and don't allow people into their special circles.  I am by no means a nuclear physicist, but I do know I combination of tough economic times, bad weather, and people, who seem to shrug off the tiniest bit of social awkwardness around them would drive any man into a severe depression. 

I should know because although I have not had a diagnosis of Asperger's Syndrome, I know how it feels to be socially awkward and unable to grasp the concepts of social interaction.  It's a damn shame people have to be so arrogant and not accepting to others.

Here's what I gather:  A person has to have prerequisites to have friends in this area:

1:  Must have college degree
2:  Must be at least Avi level 1 certified
3:  Must have at least 3 years experience climbing
4:  Must have maximum physical fitness to not slow down the group
5:  Must be able to hold a one hour conversation without silence or stuttering
6:  Must own a home by the age of 30
7:  Must be married before 35 years of age.

Shall I continue?
8: Born to a rich family who can pay for their college and then by them a $400,000 condo while they pursue college and can hook up with any girl they wanted.

I never thought, I would have to have prerequisites to make friends up here.  All I've got to say about this is BULLY PUCKY!

You can call me a bitter old man, yet only in his 30s, but I'm sure anyone who tries to reach out to others consistently but only gets the silent treatment would go mentally insane.

How's this:  I find it odd I can make friends everywhere else I've been, but not here.  I guess I'm just not good enough up here.

?.  We, the friendly bottom feeders are out there. Maybe poke around a little more.

First I'm going to give you the best advice you can get from here.

Quit bitching. Seriously dude. You're going to stero type everyone here then bitch that you don't have a friend to hang with, I can see why.

I've thrown out a ton of requests here about skiing and only had 1 person actually go with me due to timing. If you want to ski, I'm going tomorrow to Rainier, you're more than welcome to tag along as I always enjoy people to hang with.

But honestly, complaining about things, then wondering why people are avoiding you is probably not the best idea. Maybe a better approach of "Hey, I've been trying to go hang with people lately, but nobody seems to commit, what gives" would be a better side.

That being said, my contact info can be found in the partners wanted section if you're interested ever for anything.

no you dont suck. just give it some time man. you'll meet great freinds if you hang out at the ski hill long enough. instead of looking for partners on the internet check out some popular bc spots like baker backcountry. tag along with a group. say hi. talk about the conditions, equipment, granola...banning plastic bags...whatever. bring a bbq and some beers to the parking lot. you'll eventually see the same people twice.

as far as physical fitness, i personally do not want to spend a bunch of my time and money only to be slowed down and not reach my preset goals for the day. sorry, thats just the way it is most skier/ climber people.

Avy 1 cert is a good idea for any bc skier. maybe there is some people in the class at you same speed/ skilll level that you can carpool with up to the slopes?

Recycling plastic bags uses a ton of energy and resources.

You need to go to the website" cliff-jumping all-year". There's not many of us left but we're a friendly bunch although must warn you we are prone to long awkward silences as we contemplate the awaiting abyss below

You forgot to add

"acquire a black or short brown haired lab during your 20's."

I'm guessing mid-summer troll on this one

I have a few questions to help me figure out whether I merit any friends.

The biggest one is: How many of the requirements do you have to meet? Simple probability suggests that the more conditions are added, the smaller the population, approaching zero for all of the conditions.

Does it matter how many times you have been married before 35 years of age? Do you have to actually be married when you turn 35 or is it okay to have been married for a while prior to that time?

Where is the requirement about owning a Subaru?

The "not slow down the group" requirement is tricky. By that logic, if there is any variation in fitness at all, then somebody is slowing down the group no matter how fit everybody is. So I think the real requirement here is that you have to be able to identify clumps of people with exactly identical amounts of fitness.

Is condition 6 still satisfied if the home's mortgage is underwater?

Do you have to have the on hour conversation while skinning up hill?

Condition 8 (parents bought you the $400k condo) is a mystery. My parents still think a dollar is too much to pay for a cup of coffee.

Lastly, if you do not meet enough of the conditions, do you still get to keep the friends you have or is it sayonara to them?

I have a few questions to help me figure out whether I merit any friends.

The biggest one is: How many of the requirements do you have to meet?  Simple probability suggests that the more conditions are added, the smaller the population, approaching zero for all of the conditions.

Does it matter how many times you have been married before 35 years of age?  Do you have  to actually be married when you turn 35 or is it okay to have been married for a while prior to that time?

Where is the requirement about owning a Subaru?

The "not slow down the group" requirement is tricky.  By that logic, if there is any variation in fitness at all, then somebody is slowing down the group no matter how fit everybody is.  So I think the real requirement here is that you have to be able to identify clumps of people with exactly identical amounts of fitness.

Is condition 6 still satisfied if the home's mortgage is underwater?

Do you have to have the on hour conversation while skinning up hill?

Condition 8 (parents bought you the $400k condo)  is a mystery.  My parents still think a dollar is too much to pay for a cup of coffee. 

Lastly, if you do not meet enough of the conditions, do you still get to keep the friends you have or is it sayonara to them?

I'd say you'd have to meet at least 3 of them. As long as you've been married or had a girlfriend you are good. It's when you have never had a girlfriend or experienced your first kiss that can seem to be an automatic disqualifying trait deeming one unworthy of friendship. As long as you've owned a home at one point in your life you are good. The conversation can occur on any setting. Lastly, if you have friends before meeting any of these requirements than you must not be socially awkward, an Aspie, or someone who's seen as a loser.

just dont expect your first kiss with a tay and you're good.

Aspie,

You might suck, but I don't know you. Please feel happy though that on this day you brought a smile and some needed entertainment to this one's depressing day. One suggestion: spell check will make one look smarter than they maybe really are . Welcome to TAY and the NW,

Boot

I missed something because I am dense and did not read carefully.  I am sorry for my snarky questionaire.  I remember well, although it was a long time ago now, how difficult it was for me to figure out the basics of certain social interactions, and it was not fun.  PNW is a great place that has been kind to me since we moved here, and I hope you are able to have good experiences with new friends around here.

Please don't diss the bag ban.  It's a good thing, although small on the scale of the many abuses we heap on our environment every day.

Just a thought-

The use of the phrase "Bull Pucky" in your lexicon may be holding you back.

Are you hanging out at the mall food court?
and talking outdoors stuff?

I drive trucks, I do not have a college degree

am unmarried, No significant other, either, although I am not 35, so I have a few years on that one...

I have never owned a house, I live in a dirtbag apartment. I am over 30, and my parents didnt buy me a condo.. the injustices in this world!

Not sure about the 1 hour conversation thing... probably, I talk too much..

I am not the most fit person, I am actually kind of fat. A girl, too, that makes it worse...

I have lived here less than a year, and people ski with me...

I do have avy 1 and a subaru, though.. maybe that is it..? ???

Seriously, OP, work on fixing what you don't like, and just get out anyway you can.... I have had threads asking for partners and I never heard from you!

Maybe we could use this thread to sticky a post with our phone numbers and days we can normally ski.

I put posts up in the partners thread all the time and 75% of the time they're for people asking to ski other days that I'm not asking about. It's cool, but when I'm looking for a partner the day I'm wanting to ski is pretty set in stone due to work schedule

For me, any fri/sat is a good time to ski assuming my gf is working one of those days.

I live 4 hours away from Mt. Baker in Canada, and I was able to reach out and push the TAY button once and hook up w/ peeps one time! It's hard scheduling people together of varying abilities and time factors and all, just keep trying, ski season never ends so... on another note I'm sick of hearing Don Henley at this time of year!

Troll, for sure..  and he left out the #1 requirement - born here!!  No worries, mate,  nothing personal, we hate everybody when it's hot and dry..     ;D

I'm thinking it's RonJ, flying off the deep end cuz somebody left the 'Refrigerator' door open and it all melted out..

but hey, hope and change is coming..     

Here's what I gather:  A person has to have prerequisites to have friends in this area:

1:  Must have college degree
2:  Must be at least Avi level 1 certified
3:  Must have at least 3 years experience climbing
4:  Must have maximum physical fitness to not slow down the group
5:  Must be able to hold a one hour conversation without silence or stuttering
6:  Must own a home by the age of 30
7:  Must be married before 35 years of age.

Shall I continue?
8:  Born to a rich family who can pay for their college and then by them a $400,000 condo while they pursue college and can hook up with any girl they wanted.

You sound more awkwardly social than most but I assume that you don't have a college degree based on #1 above so you probably aren't an electrical engineer...

From your own list:
1. Check, college degree done.
2. Check, avi 1 cert, 2x with firsthand avi experience too.
3. I only have 2 years of climbing experience and the last couple of months have been riddled with soccer related injuries.
4. Sometimes I'm the fastest in the group but that's not common because I don't like to go out solo...
5. Nada, can't hold a conversation for the life of me unless I'm boring someone to death with a detailed explanation of suck/squish/bang/blow.
6. I don't own my own home but I have a down payment in the bank and just bought a new car. I'd rather be more mobile and able to move back to Europe if I wanted to.
7. I have 3 years left to hit that mark.
8. Seriously? My parents helped me get through school but my first year I was paying $150/mo in rent and $50 in food.

So I've got 2 of your 8 but in another year I should be able to get some friends once I finish my climbing apprenticeship. There are a couple of items on the list that I'll never get to so I won't worry about them. There are a couple that I can improve so I'll try to move them up my list of priorities (fitness > beer?).

I think that if you haven't kissed anyone by 30 then you really do have some social issues that aren't location specific but maybe it's a good sign that you should focus more time on what you are passionate about. Get out in the mountains, educate yourself on the dangers of the NW snowpack, spend more time cragging or climbing at the gym. If that doesn't do it then try what one of my friends does: compliment every attractive woman walking by on whatever stands out the most, great shoes, giant purses, purple eyelashes, whatever they're showing off. Prepare to get slapped, maybe get some false leads on dates, take one home, get kissed. At least you'll have some good stories to get you through the hour of conversation that way.

If you chose your logon name as a slang term that makes fun of people born with Aspergers then yes, you suck as a person. But don't take my word for it, I only qualify for the first 7 criteria.

www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Seattle%20Freeze

I think this is what the OP is getting at. I would like to see a trip report from him/her. This is an interesting thread for a first time posting on ski/board touring website.

Take heart Aspieski, even the Edmonds 'Temperature Taker Dude' managed to find a place for himself here.

I love it!

1:  Must have college degree
2:  Must be at least Avi level 1 certified
3:  Must have at least 3 years experience climbing
4:  Must have maximum physical fitness to not slow down the group
5:  Must be able to hold a one hour conversation without silence or stuttering
6:  Must own a home by the age of 30
7:  Must be married before 35 years of age.

I keep saying to MY kids, IF you stay focused and work hard, these things are ALL attainable.

(everything but the condo ;D)

I have always blamed my lack of friends on my impatient, self-centered, socially tactless attitude.  Apparently it has been someone else's fault this whole time.

Actually, I have met great people almost everytime I have used the partners wanted section.  Some have turned into friends and regular partners.  I only feel limited in the depth and breadth of my ski relationships due to my own issues.  My own personality being the most important but also affected by wife, kid, and house.

My perspective on "the list"

1) My wife and virtually all of my friends have degrees while I do not - fail
2) Avi 1 certified - pass
3) Technically I pass this one but much of my experience is indoor or sport and my outdoor trad climbing has been spread over time with no more than 4 to 5 times in any single year.  As a dedicated climber? - fail
4) I don't want to wait for you but you better not ditch me either - fail
(actually I find this to be mostly a nonissue in the BC, route choice and slope angle might be a better qualification)
5) Friends don't keep yammering when you want them to shut up - fail
6) ? - fail
7) Assuming we are talking marriage, not girlfriend/kiss, I missed by 2 years - fail

8 ) No-one I know - fail


If you are trying to join the Inner Circle, you probably should not be seen skiing with me

Aspie - Thanks for posting this, I enjoyed it for purely entertainment reasons.  On the serious side, Seattle is more impersonal than it used to be.  I find the BC community to be different than the area as a whole because the people seem more open and welcoming to anyone regardless of background or ability.  If you are serious about making ski friends I can highly recommend the partners wanted section.  Placing your own post will probably get the best results.

Nowhere in this discussion is anything mentioned about having an awesome dog -- if your dog doesn't love you -- why should anyone else ? OTH if your dog loves you -- what do you care about those persnickety humans?

More seriously -- check out a club such as the infamous mounties, the washington alpine club or even the washington ski touring club. Enrolling in the Avy I class offered by the mounties is good way to develop those skills and meet like minded folks.

I'm guessing mid-summer troll on this one

Agreed.

I have always blamed my lack of friends on my impatient, self-centered, socially tactless attitude.  Apparently it has been someone else's fault this whole time.
,,,

priceless..   

Nowhere in this discussion is anything mentioned about having an awesome dog...

"If you want a friend in Washington," Harry S. Truman once said, "get a dog."

Source: www.smithsonianmag.com/history-archaeolo...s.html#ixzz25klM5xvW

Wow, interesting conversation going on.

Isn't making and meeting friends what TAY is all about? A community of people with a passion for skiing in the backcountry all year long?

I've lived in the PNW for 5 years now. I often say to my wife that my biggest problem here is not terrain and the distance to get to it, but finding people to go with. Since I am married and have children I have a rule to never go alone. So in order to ski, I need to find partners.

But slowly, patiently, over time I have connected with great people through TAY and word of mouth. My list of partners is growing. Mostly the challenge comes with schedules matching up now as most of us have work and other obligations to fill.

I hope to one day ski with many of the legendary people who post here. I've made a good start I think with Telemack, James, and Atomic. Lowell Skoog and Amar have been gracious enough to correspond with me when I've had questions about conditions and other things.

I also recognize that choosing one's partners is something we should all respect. I like the analogy of a rope team... we really rely on one another for our lives in many ways. I think it is okay to ski with those with whom you feel the most comfortable and who help you reach your goals. My goals are first to have loads of fun and then to return home safely my family.

I just realized that it took about one year and 30 pm's between telemack and I before our schedules aligned and we finally skied together. So I guess patience and persistence pay off.

Wow, this thread is so full of win I thought I was over in the padded room at the other place.